Monday, February 09, 2009


First off, I had nothing to do with this sign. Someone hacked into the roadway signs' systems, though and geniusly loaded this message into high-profile thoroughfares in, I think, five or six different states. Genius. But I didn't do it.

Grammys sucked. I'm done with this show, I think. I just don't think anyone really cares. The show doesn't really project itself anymore like the authoritative foundation of the industry. Everything's forced and contrived. Everything's a push for ratings. And the fact that TV on the Radio won almost every critical year-end award for Dear Science yet weren't nominated for any awards proves that there are serious holes in the selection process. Serious holes. I don't know what I propose. If you leave it up to the fans, only the most popular would receive nominations. If you leave it up to the labels, only major-label artists would get Grammys. I met someone who was a member of the Grammy organization one time and she was the most out-of-touch embicile I've ever met. She was a total nincompoop. Maybe it's just that the decision-making core of the Grammys are just old folks with no ear for pertinent and timely music. I do have to say, though, I ain't go no problem with Robert Plant taking home armfuls of Grammys. Man, he went from sexy young woman to creepy old bearded man. What a career that man's had. Paul McCartney sucked (thud). U2 sucked (thud). Coldplay, eh, decent. Every time some country folk jumped on stage, they stunk it up. People should just stop inviting country folk. I saw Trace Adkins in the audience and thought, "No, I'm sorry, this show is only for musicians." Radiohead killed it. Every rap performance sucked horribly. Adele took it. Girl was dope. Kanye's hair killed it. I kept fantasizing about Stevie standing up during the performance with the Jonas Brothers, taking off his glasses, walking up to one Nick and just knocking him out cold with one punch to the forehead and then just walking off stage shaking his head in frustration. The night we found out that Stevie wasn't blind, just eccentric.

Chris Brown apparently smacked Rihanna. Sounds like Bobby and Whitney all over again.

Celtics can't win the big games. We lost to Lakers and then the Spurs in the last three games. Both at home. Ugh. Rapist and Laker, Kobe Bryant then, with a flu, beat LeBron at home for the first time since the 2008 season proving that Kobe would do anything to be Michael Jordan. He wasn't sick, folks. I hate to tell you. That was all fake.

A-Rod apparently tested positive for steroids back in 2003 with the Texas Rangers. So let's name a Yankee that hasn't tested positive? This dude's had a great offseason. Madonna called him a "poet" and now steroid allegations. Yeah, he's gonna have some awesome trips to Fenway this year. What's even more sad is that despite using steroids and putting up record numbers, the Rangers still ended up in last place. That's how bad this team sucks. I mean, look at their mascot.
I hate to tell you, but my nephew's better than yours. The kid's just a ladies' man. He won my lovely wife's heart over and just about every other woman in Midland. And he's sharper than a tack. Brains and beauty? Good genes.
We're still trying to figure out, though, how to swing a baseball bat. Some would tell me that I might wanna wait until he's two years old. Maybe so. I'm just hopeful that he'll be playing in the league at the Dominican eighteen (14 years old).
Nah, he's got too much brains to become a professional athlete. The dude was mixing the sounds of two different toys right in front of us. He's also been seen playing pots and pans with drumsticks. I think we have a musical genius on our hands. Keep an eye on him. His name's Parker Jeffrey.

Tux got his.
And I got mine. Lubbock is clearly a superior metro because they have a Krispy Kreme and the Yellow doesn't. While we were passing through, we grabbed a dozen Krispys, a mug of their fantastic coffee and a hat to remember it by. I went right for the devil's food cake. So freaking good. I distinctly remember hearing a ringing in my ear for nearly twenty minutes after consuming two Krispy Kremes. I tell myself that it's a healthy ringing.

I can't even recall how many of those Krispys I crammed down, but it was enough. And it was well worth it. Must get back on my running regiment. Gotta get my legs in shape for Taos the end of the month. Yep, the Roundhouse Skiing & Boarding Expedition departs on February 27th.


TX said...

That's one cute kid...oh yeah...he's mine. :-) I can see the Wikipedia entry now. "While Mozart was hailed for playing his first violin concerto at age 4, Parker Jeffrey Wyrick eclipsed the Great One by showing remarkable mixing skills utilizing the latest in baby toy technology to mix his first track at only 15 months. He then walked into a TV screen and sucker punched the e-Trade kid right in the chops to show how gangsta he was."

sarahsmile3 said...

We had the zombie warning in Austin. Pretty dang funny. They could not do it in Amarillo because too many locals strongly resemble zombies. Adding a sign like that would just get the shot guns a-goin'.

j3 said...

well put, but you well know that austin is crawling with the same. difference is that austin folk TRY to look like zombies. yellow folk just do.

sarahsmile3 said...

You got me there, bub. Right now, our city is crawling with the hipsters. I want to punch the next guy I see wearing skinny jeans and horn rimmed glasses (both purchased in the women's section at Buffalo Exchange).