Friday, October 31, 2008

WE ARE THE STADIUM MOTEL

My hometown of Lubbock has been experiencing some incredible growth. Beginning with a new freeway that basically hatched the egg of growth some five years ago, the town is exploding in all directions with unprecedented growth. The Jones even recently underwent some incredible renovations making it look like (gasp) a real college football stadium. Everytime I go home, I make the comment that I just don't recognize the city anymore. Every corner in that city is getting a facelift, it seems. Especially the area that was once known as "Overton"--a seedy little neighborhood sitting in the sunset shadows of Jones Stadium's east side. Over the last, four years or so, Overton has basically been flattened except for the churches, it's families relocated to adjacent neighborhoods and erected on the same ground, uptown living with four-digit rent, Starbucks, a bank, beautiful retail space, water fountains, stylish cobble streets and plenty of activity on gameday.

Gone are the days where one would fear the trecherous walk back to their parked automobile after the game's last minutes with pepper spray in hand and eyes on the back of their head. I, personally, would walk with clinched fists and a meanmug to ward off anyone punk thinking I'd be an easy take.

McDougal Properties, one of the biggest development/construction outfits in the region, was the company taking on the uptownization of Overton. Reads their press release: By the 1980's, the area had changed primarily into a rental community for low-income residents with approximately 97% of the property owned by absentee owners. Crime increased dramatically with almost one-fourth of all reported crimes in the city coming from North Overton, which represented only 3% of Lubbock's population. Burglars struck at twice the rate of any other neighborhood, drug dealers worked openly, and prostitutes camped out on the street corners. These conditions presented a sad commentary on a once proud and stately neighborhood.

A noble cause, indeed. And McDougal, in all of their nobility, brought on their wrecking ball and completely wiped the turd of a neighborhood off the map--erasing the memory of yesteryears from Lubbock's east side. At the far east end, they built a Wal-Mart (so much for keeping it classy) and apartments on the west. Except, in all of their deconstruction, the forgot one little landmark. With front-door views of the 7-11 parking lot and the strong stinch of last night's trick, the Stadium Motel--like the cockroach that survived the H-bomb--still remains standing only footsteps or a drunken crawl across University Avenue to the gameday festivities.
I don't personally know anyone who has stayed there and, even after years in existence, you still can't find a single review of it online. I would never venture to stay there at this point. Possibly when I was in school as a field study but I've grown past those days. How is it that a sad, pathetic lil' whorehouse could escape the gentrification of Overton? How is that the Stadium Motel, with its satellite dish erected like it's proud middle finger to McDougal, still stands?

It's the ultimate underdog story. In many ways, the Tech football team is the Stadium Motel. We're that small, humble football team thrown the scraps of the big conferences, clawing and scratching our way through our schedule, hoping for bowl glory somewhere in Mississippi or Virginia. Meanwhile, our bigger and richer competitors are winning national championships and building huge high-class apartments and running the poor, less-afluent families to the edge of town. We are the Stadium Motel. You tried to get rid of us, but we survived--hidden under our lil' FREE CHECKING billboard from your swining wrecking ball. We still got dead cockroaches holding walls up, a druggie with a needle in his arm, a resident who keeps mice as pets, a prostitute who turns eight tricks an hour and a gas leak that hasn't been fixed in seven years. And they still can't kill us.

No doubt, Texas and all of their flash and Nike apparel is a daunting opponent. We have not a single National Championship to our name. Our players go onto mediocre careers in Europe at the very best. Our short list of notable traditions include throwing tortillas on the field. That's no longer tradition. We don't really have any traditions, I guess, except coming in second or third.

Well, here we sit at #7 in the nation. Either we're really good or we fooled almost every writer in America all the way to the Top Ten. I was listening to ESPN Radio on the way home from work and the dude on there said that tomorrow's game will be, "The best game in college football this season." In Lubbock? Just across from the Stadium Motel? In the same stadium that I used to usher old folks to their seats in my lil' Boy Scout uniform? Where a seat in the grass used to cost five bucks? Where after halftime you could just walk in and watch for free? The center of the college football universe is in Lubbock?

Looks like every room is booked in Lubbock. In fact, the report from ESPN is that when GameDay announced they'd be broadcasting live from Lubbock earlier in the week, there was nowhere available for their crew of 65 people. No telling where they're having to stay. Maybe at the Stadium Motel.

I make no guarantees on the game. I've already put in my predicted my outcome for all to see--49-42, Texas Tech. But really, at the very least, I'm hoping we give 'em hell and make it a good game. When there's no team in college football better than your opponent, winning is never an assumed outcome and you just play the most perfect game you can.

Leach is ready.
In honor of the great Mike Leach, here's my favorite quotable coming from a pre-game press session before the Texas A&M game a few years back: “How come they get to pretend they are soldiers? The thing is, they aren’t actually in the military. I ought to have Mike’s Pirate School. The freshmen, all they get is the bandanna. When you’re a senior, you get the sword and skull and crossbones. For homework, we’ll work pirate maneuvers and stuff like that.”

Thursday, October 30, 2008

BREAKING DOWN THE SECOND BEST RECORD IN HIP HOP HISTORY

It's 5:30 in the morning and because I'm so dedicated to the cause and want to keep my heads ringing, as I believe the kids would say now, I'm pushing to get De La Soul is Dead mix done before I leave town for the mountains tomorrow, but I'm still searching for a sample and, trust me, it ain't done until I find this sample. If any of you cats are resourceful enough, help me out because I'm out of options. The song is "That's No Lie" by White Lightning. Call it a homework assignment. Impress me.

Altogether, when truly broken down and explored, Dead is completely different record from 3 Feet. Lyrically, it's even headier than it's predecessor. For one, De La the parodies and pimps themselves to a point of absolute denouncement of their fun-loving hippy schtick. They also venture into hotspots like sexual assault, drug abuse and the scathing commentary on the gangstaisms of their West Coast brethren. Sonically, it's as much heavier funk-jazz record as it is a goofy disco-dance record. Prince Paul grows ages beyond his early efforts with Stetsa and De La as he moves to more long-form production instead of the sporadic and scattered trickery of his earlier projects. And this mix plays to that with, in some cases, completely uncut inclusion of the original sample like Funkadelic's "I'll Stay" or Fred Wesley and the JB's "Pass the Peas." The tempo is more relaxed and deliberate. The mood is slightly more somber and reflective. De La Soul is Dead is a beast you just ain't ready for, kid.
The mix is, uh, 92% done at this point and is completely mixed down and balanced except for the last ten minutes. Gotta find that sample.
Phillies won the Series which led to some scatching commentary from my brother who predicted that I'd say that the only way the NL could win is if the Red Sox wore down the AL contender before they got to the big dance as we did the Tampa Bay Longorias. I mentioned that they probably would've won more than one game in the Series had they not gone a full seven against the Red Sox. Maybe we were just paying back Philly for giving us Francona. I'm still pretty confident that the Sox could've taken Philly, but I guess we'll never know. That's what we get for not actually making it to the Series. But, man, Rays pulled a Rockies-no-show this year, huh? So hot. So strong. So dominating. So much for momentum. Doing the AL East proud. Thanks, guys.
Countdown has begun to the Texas-Tech battle this weekend in Lubbock. Guess we know who John Daly's behind. What's more Austin than orange and public intoxication?

Just ask the drunk asshole that's sure to be stumbling around the neighborhood this weekend. Glad we'll be in the mountains. Just kidding on the Austin-slammery, my dearest Sarah and Dale. Man, the coffee's good this morning.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

LET'S GET THIS OVER WITH

I've finally had enough of McCain and his tiny arms (queue Creed's "With Arms (kinda) Wide Open"). I'm ready for this election to bury this guy's campaign and his four-eyed freak of a VP once and for all. I'm ready for Joe the Plumber to, actually, go plumb as opposed to campaigning for McCain. I made the mistake of questioning Joe's credentials in front of sleeping right-wingers and I almost lost my head. I guess I was wrong and he wasn't just hired by the Repubs as a hood ornament for their taxation plan. Well, his check from the RNC will help will help with the $250K+ tax that Obama's gonna hit him with. And, c'mon Joe, you're doing a lot better than most Americans if you're buying a company with annual revenues of $250,000. Especially for a guy who is not a licensed plumber (allegedly) and already owes back taxes (allegedly). Might want to be current in your taxes before you try and slam a presidential nominee in public for, of all things, a tax plan.

Obama's delaying the World Series tonight for his 30-minute infomercial. Not sure if that's the best move for him...at least in Philadelphia. Pennsylvania's a battleground state delaying coverage of the Phillies in the World Series certainly doesn't help his cause. You're saying, "But j3, Florida is a battleground state as well." Yeah, but I think he can afford the 25 votes coming from Devil Ray Nation. This is just further proof that no one cares about this World Series. No one cares. I heard that Game 3 sphinctored off the third-lowest ratings in World Series history. Guess as good of a story as the Devil Rays are (allegedly), tied 1-1 with the Phillies just isn't intriguing enough to hold an audience.

Tech's got Texas this weekend and, once and for all, we'll see how this team holds up against a true contender, in fact, number one in the nation. Longhorns are stout, indeed, but I gotta like Tech's chances. They can't field a better team and their place kicker is a walk-on who won a kicking contest for a free month's rent. Turns out he'll probably get his school paid for as well and will play in ESPN/ABC's Game of the Week on national television. Upgrade. I'll be watching from a sports bar in Taos where I'll be spending the weekend. Good thing because I'm surrounded by moron Longhorn fans (who barely graduated from high school) who might push me to the brink. I'll throw this out there: Tech wins 49-42 and take over #3 in the nation on Monday.

The NBA's back and the C's beat Lebron and the Cavs, 90-85. Aw yeah.

I was out sick yesterday, but baby I'm back. I love each and everyone of you in a very special way.

Friday, October 24, 2008

THE BAR-KAYS WERE TOO BAD...

It's just necessary for me to point out this morning before I go about my busy day which will end with a drive down to Midland for my nephew's first birthday (whaddup, Park?) that the Bar-Kays were absolutely sick. After working on the De La mix, the Cypress mix, the Gangsta mix and now the Office Party mix, I'm convinced that the Bar-Kays were the baddest thing coming back in the day. I'm listening to "Jiving Around" which is actually on the Del mix that I'm working on and these dudes were just crazy ill. They would just ooze greatness on every track and, little did they know, that what they were doing would later lay the foundation for some of the greatest hip hop we'd ever know.

Dude talk about the JB's, Parliament/Funkadelic, the Meters, Sly...all dem. But mentioning the Bar-Kays immediately puts you in the funkiest of circles, I'm convinced. Did lunch with Babu from the Dilated Peoples who was in town for our convention and we spoke briefly of the Bar-Kays after he mixed "Humpin'" into his set. From that conversation, I've begun immersing myself in their music and I gotta tell ya, these dudes were ill.
Tragedy struck the young band back in 1967 when, on their way to backing Otis Redding at a Wisconsin show, their plane crashed into Lake Monona killing Redding, four members of the Bar-Kays and managers. The only survivor was trumpeter Ben Cauley who would march on to reform the band with bassist James Alexander. They would later be the backing band for Isaac Hayes' seminal Hot Buttered Soul.
I'm up on a Friday morning talking about the Bar-Kays. What are you listening to?
F'real?
C'mon, kid, you're col slippin'. You need to do the knowledge, homie.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

MEMOIRS OF A SLEEPWALKER

Been up since 3AM. It's now 4:30 and I've decided to just do that damned thing.


You know, I really only do this now about once a month. It was beginning to be a twice or, worse, thrice a month issue, but my body's resting much better after kicking back on the coffee. All this economy talk has got me rattled. I'm not really sure why. Maybe I'm just giving in and believing that the economy which, as Bill Hicks would say, isn't even real anyway is truly wrecked beyond repair. I mean, money is money and most of it ain't real anyway. And the US Mint, in hard times, just prints more. If we can make money, what's the problem? Obama wants to redistribute the wealth and we know how that gets rich Republicans' panties in a wad. Socialism? Yeah, maybe. Then, at the same time, I don't know anything right about rich muddahs getting richer in times like this. As a kid, I always used one thing thing to differentiate Republicans and Democrats. Republicans are rich and want to stay rich and Democrats want that cash. I just remember all the rich neighborhoods growing up had BUSH signs and all the poor-to-middle class neighborhoods had DUKAKIS signs. Back then, Dems wanted that nice Republi-bank to support stupid initiatives like alternative fuels, you know, running a car on vegetable oil and sunlight and curbing the deteriation of our natural resources. Stupid Dems. Why on earth would we ever want to stop using gas?

I don't really get wrapped up in the notion of Obama being an icon for change and hope. I'm not quite that naive anymore. But, at that same time, this whole system is broken. We got a war that just won't end, a resulting recession is resting in on top of us, banks are falling, the housing market is ruined and the Red Sox are watching Tampa Bay drop a turd on their carpet against the Phillies in the World Series. Now, Obama might not put the Sox back in the Series (but he might get the Cubbies there), but I'm fed up. My lovely wife and I were talking last night about the war and how cats are coming home with post-traumatic stress disorder and how our government is nowhere ready for the tens of thousands of troops who will, hopefully, be coming home soon and will be needing psychological and psychiatric assistance. And we have a country fixated on "victory" and how we can't pull out now because we haven't won. Are we so proud as a country that we're willing to sacrifice human life to win a war that can't be won? Can it be won? Obama might not be the answer, but do I buy, for a second, that this cat is gonna change the game?

I'm hearing now, locally, how people are stealing/defacing political signs here in town. We've clearly lost our minds. It's like adults playing capture the flag. People need to get a grip.

You know, if we are in a recession, I like my chances of survival more than the next cat. I was born for economic survival. I live in the dark, ride my bike to work and eat chicken, spinach and eggs. Of course, I have a mortgage which kinda throws a wrench in the plans.

I had an idea the other day. A rarity. We put scales at the gas pumps and your price depends on the weight of your automobile. That way, cats still driving Hummers and Executioners will have to pay, say, $5.00 a gallon and dudes like myself just filling up my little Civic, can get $1.50 gas. There's a redistribution of wealth. With all the retards driving Ford F150's, I bet the national average would still be about $3.50 a gallon.

I'm feeling good about this ski season. There's already snow hitting the plains about a two hours north of the Yellow. I just want three days on a mountain this year. I'm thinking Taos in January or February.

Hip hop still sucks in 2008. In the meantime, I'm looking a few different concepts for my next mix. I could tackle De La Soul is Dead which is already planned or go ahead and rip this Christmas mix out for all your holiday parties. I also have a money mix in light of the economic panic. Last option is my breakdown of Del's I Wish My Brother George was Here. Any preferences?

I just decided that the only fundamental difference between me and my lovely wife is this: coffee.

I've committed to having the official The Root Down shirts ready for Christmas gifts. There'll be two different prints--the lowrider design and the bongos design. I'm just looking for a shop good enough to print these beauties up.

It's Halloween again. Which means the only option for women is to dress like prostitutes. My lovely wife and I went out to the costume store to check out the scene this year and I'm truly amazed how everything for the ladies is like underwear in different colors. You could be a sexy bumblebee and it's essentially yellow and black lingerie. Or you could be a sexy police woman and it's blue-grey lingerie with a nightstick to accessorize. The expectations for women are a little unfair. Dude's just show up in regular street clothes and they get a pass, but if a woman shows up at a party in anything other than panties and a bra, dudes are like, "What? You're not dressing up this year?"

Same rules for Halloween trick-or-treaters this year. Peep the list here.

There's something amazing about TBS airing old "Saved by the Bell" episodes at six in the morning.

It's Thursday and I love everyone of you in my own little way. Today would be a good day for you to get into Ultramagnetic MCs. Just trust me on this one.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

MUSIC FOR OFFICE PARTIES

Per Owen's request, here's a little getdown mix as we go into the holiday season (I've got a Christmas mix on deck, but it's a ton of material) to use at your office party. Office parties can be such a drag, man. Funny how people, at office parties, do everything they can to not talk business and then find out that they really can't talk about anything else intelligently. Well, this mix fills in those awkward silences and pauses between discussions of how some cat's bowel movements stink up the whole west side of the building. Remember, though, it's an office party and these are your co-workers so watch those hands. You might have Human Resources at your desk come Monday.

This mix features the soft sounds of the Emotions, Rufus' "Chicken," a timely run at the Honeydrippers' "Impeach the President," T-Connection and Pat Lundy's explosive "Work Song." Yep, this is the illness right here. Click HERE to download and watch for the thongs.

Dynasty “Adventures in the Land of Music”
Se Si Bon “Cher Chez la Femme”
KC and the Sunshine Band “I Get Lifted”
The Emotions “Blind Alley”
The Honeydrippers “Impeach the President”
Kool and the Gang “Jungle Jazz”
The Tom Tom Club “Genius of Love”
Claudia Berry “For the Sake of Love”
Barry White “I Wanna Stay”
Rufus Thomas “Do the Funky Chicken”
Charles Wright “Express Yourself”
Charles Wright “You Gotta Know Whatcha Doin’”
JB’s “Monorail”
Labi Siffre “I Got the Blues”
The Bar Kays “Holy Ghost”
Kool and the Gang “Hollywood Swinging”
Dyke and the Blazers “Let a Woman Be a Woman and a Man Be a Man”
The Commodores “The Assembly Line”
Sweet Daddy Floyd “I Just Can’t Help Myself”
Sylvia Striplin “You Can’t Turn Me Away”
Ann Peebles “I Can’t Stand the Rain”
Banbarra “Shack Up”
T-Connection “Groove to Get Down”
Carl Carlton “She’s a Bad Mama Jama”
Soul Searchers “Ashley’s Roachclip”
King Errisson “Listen to the Music”
Freddie Robinson “River’s Invitation”
Wild Sugar “Bring It Here”
Sly and Family Stone “Crossword Puzzle”
Bo Diddley “Hit or Miss”
Freddy Scott “You Got What I Need”
Pat Lundy “Work Song”
Earth Wind and Fire “C’mon Children”
The Detroit Emeralds “Baby, Let Me Take You”
Cold Blood “Shop Talk”

Monday, October 20, 2008

SOX OVER...

Yeah, we couldn't quite pull off the "greatest comeback in baseball history" again. We did, however, give it a good run. We ran into a kid named Matt Garza who has a pretty tasty fastball (and oddly wears earplugs to block out the home crowd--what the?). Rays are a good squad, indeed, but I'm a sore loser and have problems handing out compliments so I'll just stop there.

Gotta love the Sox, though. Now the crafty veterans of the league not because we're old, but because we win consistantly, the Sox were on the verge of elimination only seven outs away from packing up and end up getting two more games...forcing last night's Game 7. Only eleven teams have forced a Game 7 after being down 1-3 or worse in baseball history and this team has done it three of those times in the last four years. This team never gives up. Last night, we ran into a wall. We beat the best team in the league in the Angels and lost in seven to the second best team in the league. I'll take it. Why are there domes in Florida? Even the Mariners play outdoors.

Check out this gem of a jaded and lonely Seattle Mariners fan proclaiming his unrelenting hate for the Red Sox after we went down 1-3 in this Series. For some reason, I see Tampa Bay fans experiencing the same emotion. I mean, with one good year for the franchise, I don't see many people who actually love the Rays as much as Floridians who just hate the Yankees and Red Sox. Of course, I can understand what it feels like losing at the hand of a menacing giant for decades. Anyhow, back to this gem. Dude is just angry at the Sox because he has an inferiority complex and acute mental illness. Listen how his delusional state leads him to metaphors between sports and post-9/11 America. He hopes our loss "stings" and that Red Sox fans just "give up." Not likely, bro. He also said we could push a Game 6, but there's no way we'd force a Game 7. Bet he was crapping his pants last night.



While we're talking sports, my trashy next door neighbor (not the one with the clay armadillo in his front yard) follows University of Texas football quite closely. Actually, both of my neighbors do, but I'm speaking specifically of the drunk one to the north. On Saturday, just before the Longhorns took on the Missouri Tigers, he rolled out his new altar to his favorite football team.


Now this thing stands about five feet tall and, as a reminder that I live closer to the trailer park than I do to the gated community, this drunk retard puts it out in front of his house just outside of the front door. Such frivolous spending during these bleak economic times suggests a few things about this drunk Longhorn fan, but one thing I've noticed to be true after a few years in the Yellow (where UT is the obvious college team of choice), those who go to college, root for the college they went to. Those who didn't go to college are UT fans and buy crap like inflatable steers and five foot wide window decals for their vehiculars.

I'm a Texas Tech fan because I was born and raised in Lubbock and went to college there.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

AIGHT, LET'S GO BACK TO FLOR'DUH

You know, I really want to root for teams like the Devil Rays because I like an underdog, but sorry, I only root for one team and when they're out, I'm out. C'mon, folks, let's face it--the Sox are the underdogs of this series. We're the wild card winner. We're without our World Series MVP Mike Lowell. We traded Manny. We got a slumping slugger. Our star pitcher's gotta sore oblique. We're getting our asses col' whooped in our own house.

We look like old, slow former greats. Tampa Bay, y'know, good for them. They're fast, eating Wheaties, swinging for the fences on every pitch. They're pitchers are mowing down Sox. They've been picked on all these years and now they're on a tear. They're getting revenge, but you know what, no one really cares except Yankee fans watching "Grey's Anatomy," Fox and TBS...and my brother.

A better story, to me (the devout Sox fan), is young little upstart tries to eat papa's pie and, we go down 1-3 in the series and, down 0-7 in the 7th inning of Game 5, we come back and score eight runs in the last three innings and win 8-7 and rock the kiddos on their heels. How sweet would it be now to go back to Tampa Bay and win the last two and put Tampa Bay and their entire fanbase of, uh, about 60,000 people back in the cellar.

Okay, I'm zealous. And the Devil Rays are a tough team, no doubt. And I'm serious when I say that we're the underdogs. People hate on the Sox, but let's not forget that Pedroia, Youkilis, Lester, Paplebon, Ellsbury, Masterson, Lowrie--they're all homegrown in the 'Tucket. We don't field 9 million-dollar Mannies. Call us "Goliaths," whatever. They're my team. It's the hat I wear and, tonight, after posting the second greatest comeback in postseason history (y'know, Wyricks are known for comebacks--rememeber the NBA Finals last year, Tech bowl games, Roundhouse tournies, life, etc), I'm a proud man. There's no beer left in the bottle as I finish this.

Is that Evan Longoria kissing on some lady? What the?

Get a room, duke. Oh wait, that's Johnny from the MTV's Road Rules. This is Evan Longoria. See you in Tampa. How's you're sister? Oh yeah, nice throw, Eva.
Beckett in Game 6 on Saturday night (holds breath). If necessary, Lester throws in Game 7. It's as good a chance as we have. I told Ron today, "Sox in seven." What am I gonna say? Rays in six? Sheesh.

Oh yeah, Manny's watching from his house in the hills. Let's see if we can give him a good show.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

THE RED SOX JUST AIN'T THAT GOOD...

...but we might have them right where we want them. We're down 1-3 against the Devil Rays in a 7-game series. If you're sharp at mathematics, that would mean that we're one loss away from packing up our panty drawer and going home. The Devil Rays have hit ten home runs in the last three games which is the only time in franchise history that they've hit that many home runs in three consecutive games. In short, they're hot. They've scored 31 runs in the last three games on one of the stronger pitching staffs in the game. But in a brief review of recent history, the numbers will show that the Sox, in three of the last four postseasons, have mounted improbable comebacks--two of which came seven-game series.

October 2003 (Division Series vs. Oakland A's): In a five-game series, Sox were down 0-2 and won three straight games to win the series only to have Aaron Boone and the Yanks catch a breeze on a knuckleball and eliminate us in seven games.

October 2004 (League Championship vs. Yankees): In a seven-game series, Sox were down 0-3 and one two outs away from elimination when we mounted the greatest comeback in sports history and won four straight games against the Yankees to win the series 4-3.

October 2007 (League Championship vs. Cleveland Indians): In a seven-game series, Sox were down 1-3 against the pesky Cleveland Indians when, once again, this team won three straight and beat the Indians 4-3 while outscoring them 30-5 in the last three games.

I can't say it's as possible as it was in 2003, 2004 and 2007 without Mike Lowell and a sturdy Josh Beckett, but Terry Francona's been here before. We throw Matsuzaka on Thursday, Beckett on Saturday and Lester on Sunday. Just look at it as sweeping a three-game series. That's it.

I know my brother is rooting for the Devil Rays which absolutely shakes me to my core to think of it, but whatever. He says it's a "better story." Didn't know he was a reader. Catch those De La Soul and Cypress mixes if you haven't already. Just scroll down. Wednesdays are for walking to work. I walked yesterday and got soaked with biblical rainfall. I think it's because it was Tuesday and not Wednesday.

Monday, October 13, 2008

3 CRATES DEEP AND DIGGING: THE DE LA SOUL MIX, VOL. 1

The new mix is up and ready. For those who missed a few previous posts, I worked and slaved on a mix paying homage to De La Soul and Prince Paul's crowning achievement, 3 Feet High and Rising. Released 20 years ago, the record still holds its own as a pioneering and mind-detonating example of sampling mastery. It still is often regarded as one of the most creative album in hip hop's history and, in terms of popular music, it leaves a deep footprint amongst some of the greatest records ever recorded. The mix was intended to both honor De La as well as explore the makings of 3 Feet realizing that it took years of others musical achievements to make the record what it was. Here's the track listing:

Bob Dorough "Three is the Magic Number"
De La Soul "The Magic Number"
Led Zeppelin "The Crunge"
The Mad Lads "No Strings Attached"
De La Soul "Change in Speak"
Cymande "Bra"
New Birth "Got to Get a Knutt"
De La Soul "Can U Keep a Secret"
Lyn Collins "Think (About It)"
De La Soul "Jenifa Taught Me (Derwin's Revenge)"
The Blackbyrds "Rock Creek Park"
De La Soul "Ghetto Thang"
De La Soul "Ghetto Thang (Ghetto Ximer)"
De La Soul "Transmitting Live From Mars"
The Turtles "You Showed Me"
The Mad Lads "Make This Young Lady Mine"
De La Soul "Eye Know"
Otis Redding "Sittin' on the Dock of a Bay"
De La Soul "Take It Off"
The Headhunters "God Made Me Funky"
Ben E. King "Don't Play That Song"
De La Soul "A Little Bit of Soap"
The Jamels "A Little Bit of Soap"
People's Choice "I Likes to Do It"
De La Soul "Tread Water"
War "Magic Mountain"
De La Soul "Potholes in My Lawn"
Parliament "Good Ol' Country Boy"
Detroit Emeralds "Baby, Let Me Take You"
Sly and Family Stone "Crossword Puzzle"
De La Soul "Say No Go"
Hall and Oates "I Can't Go for That (No Can Do)"
The Turtles "I'm Chief Kamanawanalea (and the Royal Macadamia Nuts)"
The Invitations "Written on the Wall"
De La Soul "Plug Tunin' (Last Chance to Comprehend)"
Barry White "I'm Gonna Love You Just a Little Bit More, Babe"
De La Soul "De La Orgee"
Bo Diddley "Hit or Miss"
De La Soul "Buddy"
The Commodores "I Think the World About You"
Sly and Family Stone "Poet"
De La Soul "Description"
Funkadelic "(Not Just) Knee Deep "
De La Soul "Me, Myself and I"
De La Soul "Me, Myself and I (Oblapos Mode)"
Edwin Birdsong "Rapper Dapper Snapper"
The Sequence "Funk You Up"
De La Soul "This is a Recording 4 Living in a Fulltime Era"
De La Soul "D.A.I.S.Y. Age"
The Rascals "My World"
Dr. Buzzard's Original Savannah Band "Hard Times"
De La Soul "Ain't Hip to be Labeled a Hippie"
De La Soul "Double Huey Skit"
The Moments "So This is Our Goodbye"
De La Soul "Brain Washed Follower"
Ray Charles "Booty Butt"
De La Soul "What's More"

To download it, hit this link right here. I got comments about some banner ad that had thongs/wedgies on it for the Cypress mix. I have no control over what banner ads z-Share put on their site. I just checked the link and it appears to be clean, but those ads might be randomized. Enjoy otherwise. And if you just click the link to see thongs, get yo head correct.

Friday, October 10, 2008

HALL AND OATES WERE DOPE (AND YOU'RE STUPID IF YOU DISAGREE)

I've had no reservations in my love for Hall and Oates in the past and those of you that know me know this. There's no salt-and-pepa duo who had a longer string of hits in the history of pimpin'. I mean, these dudes were just hawd. Often discarded as a pop hit from the eighties, there's no mistaking Daryl Hall's vocal supremacy and Johnny Oates' wrote the sultry backdrop which would launch these two into the stratosphere.

I'll take Daryl Hall against any cat out there. From "Sarah Smile" to the H&O Stairway "She's Gone," from covers like "Everytime You Go Away" (which absolutely slaughters the original, yo) to "You've Lost that Loving Feeling," (not to mention the uber-explosive "I Can't Go for That" and "Maneater"), Hall and Oates made an imprint in the both pop and soul music that is undeniable. I mean, who else would be the inspiration for this Etch and Sketch masterpiece?
Check out this video for the classic "She's Gone." What a masterful mastery of lip sync. This was back when Daryl was more Ziggy Stardust-slash-vampire-slash-eyebrowless woman-slash-col' pimp, but dude still wore it well.

Sox and Rays go tonight. Busting at the seams, here. Rays are talking in the press like their owed the AL Championship. Pretty confident team. Sox are almost saying nothing. That could be a good thing or a bad thing. We'll know tonight. Six pack of choice for tonight's clash: Sierra Nevada.

It's not often I do a product endorsement anymore, but I got a pair of Skullcandy headphones to demo and these things are insane. The low end is phenomenal and is better than any headphone I've ever used. The fit tight on the head and eliminate any outside sound or chatter. I'm taking them where ever I go and, who knows, maybe you can borrow 'em--but just for a second. If you love your music, you'll love Skullcandy headphones. Their big with snowboarders, but also with aging hip hop heads like me.

Preparing the De La mix already. You ain't ready. The process already is one of appreciation and deep study. Prince Paul was/is a beast. Those first three De La records are among the greatest that hip hop has ever heard. Do the knowledge.

Man, you gotta love Fridays. Go listen to some Hall and Oates today and love your neighbor. All this fear and Depression-talk got us all down. They ain't takin' my spirit, though.

Thursday, October 09, 2008

MY NEWEST VENTURE...

After wrapping up the Cypress mix (which has been downloaded 36 times as of this morning which is weird because I don't even know 36 people), I thought about what my new project should be. There were tons of projects I want to do, but what should I do?

The other night I was watching the VH1 Hip Hop Honors program (desperate plea for credibility) and, among the honorees were De La Soul. Now, if you know me, you know that De La Soul has always maintained within my top three favorite artists of all time of any genre. I first heard De La when I picked up a used cassette of 3 Feet High and Rising as a kid from Ralph's Records and Tapes. I think, on that same trip, I picked up Huey Lewis and the News. My head was split in two from the first listen.

The sounds, the breakbeats, the rhyme flow, the cover art, the bright colors, the flowers. I was captivated and, from that point on, there was no going back. I probably bought that cassette for $2.50. One of the best investments I ever made. I think about what if I had never gone in there that day. What if I didn't search that row of cassettes. What if I blinked as my finger ran over the spine of the cassette. I probably would've never heard that record. Turns out, De La would be a mainstay in my young life. They'd be the soundtrack to junior high as I would take De La Soul is Dead with me to school in my Walkman. I have very few memories that have lasted vividly through the years, but I remember one day I was walking to school and I ran into Kevin Monroe right outside of class. I had my headphones on and he walked up to me and asked, "What'chu listening to?" He snagged the headphones off my head and began listening. I believe "Oodles of O's" was playing. He smiled and began nodding his head. "You like that weird shit," he said laughing as he walked away. Yep, I guess I do. The De La experience for me would be a personal one. Not alot of kids in Lubbock were jamming De La Soul. Even in high school where it was Buhloone Mindstate and Stakes is High, alt rock was blowing up and the sounds of De La barely penetrated middle-of-nowhere Texas. But I had all the material and I listened with the intensity of a church boy listening to a sermon.

The other day, I snagged my copies of the first four De La records (which are always at the easiest of access) and took them up to work with me. I listen very passively up at work because, well, I have to. People envision my job as me leaning back in a chair with my feet up on a desk listening to CDs with my eyes closed. Truth is I listen more to the cross-traffic on the outside of my cube and the hum of my desk fan than actual music and that's because when I think about putting on music, I'm not thinking about my job. I have to have a rare break in the action before I actually say, "Man, it'd be nice to hear some music." The day I took my De La records up to work, though, I hardly got anything done. From the second I put on 3 Feet, I accomplished nothing. That's how good they are.

It was then that I thought that I had to do a De La mix. Original plan was to take all four records and string them together, but then you'd never get a chance to truly appreciate them. Those records are so thick with sounds that to unravel each little sample and stretch it out would be a mix that would be ten hours long. It's like if you took all the veins and arteries in the human body and strung them out, it would be a mile long (not sure if that's accurate). That's what these records are like. So, for that reason, I'm going to do them all in separate smaller mixes and I'll start with 3 Feet.

3 Feet, in its essence, is a nimble and fast record. In comparison to the records that would follow, the samples go by quickly at breakneck speeds. It bounces, weaves, dives and dashes. It's like a young prize fighter or a young skier. Young skiers cut alot quicker, enjoy moguls, jumps, tricks. As skiers get older, however, they enjoy more long slalom, less cuts and longer rides. No less the skill, mind you, just different. As De La aged, the samples went from four beats long to eight bars long. The wordplay was toned down for content and message. No less skilled and accomplished, mind you, just different. To mix all the records together would've been an absolute mess because, unlike Cypress Hill's first two records, the difference between the works are staggering. Plus, at length, it would be like listening to Beethoven's nine symphonies in succession.

I've posted this before, but it just seemed appropriate...

I've been asked about the upcoming playoff matchups from a few folks and I will say this, of course I'm pulling for the Sox, but I don't think for a second that the Rays will go any shorter than seven games. And, I'm not even sure who will win. As faithful as I am to my boys, I wouldn't bet a buck against the Rays. They're just stout and with Lowell out, Beckett sore and the bullpen tired, it's gonna take a serious push from the rest of the team to make it to the Series. Los Angeles and Angry Tim are on fire right now. I guess it makes you realize that it really is the AL East versus the rest of the league. Los Angeles wouldn't be contenders without the addition of Torre (Yankees), Manny (Sawx) and Lowe (Sawx). Would be nice to see Dodgers versus Sox in the World Series, but really, with both of these matchups due to go seven, I shouldn't get to ahead of myself.

I'm tired of McCain. My lovely wife was complaining during the debates the other night that the dude's got short arms. There's another reason not to vote for his ass, he's got short arms. How's he gonna sucka punch foreign leaders with them short arms? Guess he'll get Palin to do it for him. She's already running the show anyway.

Gas is now creeping under $3.00 now. Ever get the idea that there was really never a shortage and the high gas prices were really just big companies padding profits in a rough economy and using fear and foreign struggles to justify or excuse such hikes? After enough bitching and moaning, the oil companies finally figure, "Come down, but don't do it overnight. Do it quietly, gradually or else people will suspect something." I'm still expecting to pay $1.50 by July of next year. Too hopeful?

Stakes is high, folks. This ain't yo' momma's America. They say we'll never retire. They also say we'll live forever. Does that mean that I'll work until I'm 180 years old? To hell with that.

Monday, October 06, 2008

CYPRESS HILL MIX DONE (LINK INCLUDED)


It's all done. Just click here to download. And, because I know you'll be asking, here's the tracklist:


1 The Five Stairsteps "The New Dance Craze"
2 Village Callers "Hector"
3 Cypress Hill "The Funky Cypress Hill Shit"
4 Mandrill "Fencewalk"
5 The Bar Kays "Humpin'"
6 Cypress Hill "Real Estate"
7 The Bar Kays "Copy Cat"
8 Muddy Waters "Tom Cat"
9 Cypress Hill "Ultraviolet Dreams"
10 Rita Marley "One Draw"
11 Junior Parker "Taxman"
12 Cypress Hill "I Wanna Get High"
13 Lee Dorsey "Get Out My Life Woman"
14 Cypress Hill "Hits from the Bong"
15 Dusty Springfield "Son of a Preacher Man"
16 Cypress Hill "Scooby Doo"
17 Cypress Hill "Lick a Shot"
18 Cypress Hill "I Ain't Goin' Out Like That"
19 Black Sabbath "The Wizard"
20 Jimmy McGriff "The Bird"
21 Cypress Hill "Hole in Your Head"
22 Mel and Tim "Good Guys Only Win in the Movies"
23 Cypress Hill "Insane in the Brain"
24 Sly and Family Stone "Life"
25 Kool and the Gang "Good Times"
26 Cypress Hill "Light Another"
27 Gene Chandler "Duke of Earl"
28 Cypress Hill "Hand on the Pump"
29 Junior Walker "Shotgun"
30 Lowell Fulson "Tramp"
31 Cypress Hill "How I Could Just Kill a Man" (Spanish)
32 Cypress Hill "How I Could Just Kill a Man"
33 Music Machine "Come On In"
34 Grant Green "Down Here on the Ground"
35 Cypress Hill "Stoned is the Way of the Walk"
36 Kool and the Gang "Life is What You Make It"
37 Cypress Hill "The Phuncky Feel One"
38 The Meters "Looky-Py-Py"
39 Cypress Hill "Cock the Hammer"
40 Flora Purim "The Wind"
41 Willie Hutch "Foxy Lady"
42 Cypress Hill "Psychobetabuckdown"
43 Parliament "Aqua Boogie"
44 John Roberts "Sophisticated Funk"
45 Cypress Hill "Tres Equis"
46 Cypress Hill "Legalize It"
47 Gene Chandler "Hallelujah, I Love Her So"
48 Chuck Cornish "Funky Ali Thing"
49 Cypress Hill "Pigs"
50 Outlaw Blues Band "Deep Gully"
51 Cypress Hill "When the Shit Goes Down"
52 Cypress Hill "When the Shit Goes Down (Diamond D Mix)"
53 Joe Zawinul "Money in the Pocket"
54 Cypress Hill "Break Em Off"
55 Panzant Brothers "The Nitty Gritty"
56 Elephant's Memory "Mongoose"
57 Cypress Hill "Latin Lingo"
58 Cypress Hill "Latin Lingo (Blackout Mix)"


It times out at 1:59:33 so nearly two hours of Cypress Hill and others. Go easy...it's my first. Still a little raw, but I think it does the trick. So put it on, relax and enjoy the show, sucka.

Sunday, October 05, 2008

SAM WYRICK: A MAN WITH A BAND A NUMBER OF FANS

In the past weeks, we've dived deep into the successes and exploits of one Sam Wyrick of the Oklahoma super-group, Badly Bent. One thing I've discovered about him is lust for life and, maybe more impressive, his love for his fans. Yep, the dude actually has a pretty decent following of about twelve to fifteen Oklahomans.

Maybe it's his rendition of "Turn the Page" or his monstrous and towering frame but lovable character. Could be the well water. Maybe even it's his last name. But the people of his humble community lean on him for his artistic vision and diplomatic soundness. Plus, the dude makes the ladies go wild.

Like this woman, Margaret, who often makes appearances at his shows. Tonight, she wore Sam's favorite gown, er, whatever. She sewd it out of curtains at the local nursing home. It still smells a little like cigarette smoke from the glory days at the home, but it's masked by the putrid stinch of piss and body odor at this commode of a club. Her favorite song by Sam and the gang is when they kick into "Knockin' on Heaven's Door." In an embarrassing moment, she requested it from the back of the club as, "That song by Guns and Roses." Margaret didn't listen to much Dylan growing up. In fact, she didn't listen to much music at all which partially explains her fascination with Sam. I don't know who this cat is, but he pops up at a lot of Badly Bent shows. You gotta drink biblical amounts of that Oklahoma near-beer to get this plastered.
The dude in the white is his designated driver. His name is Phillip and he still plays with Legos. I gotta question for their site administrator. Why would you put this picture on your website? Not a very flattering photo for the man featured or Badly Bent. I'd try to find a picture of like a really hot girl in a bikini and say something like, "This and more can be seen at the next Badly Bent show." Seeing this photo would make me want to leave the state altogether. Additionally, this photo proves that, one, the photographer doesn't know what the hell they're doing and, two, not a lot of people turn out at Badly Bent shows. Look at all the empty space.
Add to it that, if in fact the band is playing, only one of these people are actually watching it happen. And neither look like they're enjoying it much. I'd probably look for photos where, say, ten or twenty people are gathered and, more importantly, looking engaged and enthused in the same general direction. In rural Oklahoma, I'd start with the personal hygiene department at the nearest Wal-Mart. This is the look of an area in the club where either someone just farted or told an offensive joke. But this does not look like much of a good time.

Then there's this guy:

Again, what does having this photo on your band's website say about the accomplishments of the band? If I wanted to sleep, I'd just stay at home and go to bed instead of spending an evening at a Badly Bent show.

Then, there's these two. The girl looks like she was just busted sniffing coke off the table and, additionally, looks really annoyed. Again, I might look for photos where people are actually enjoying themselves. Smiling. Laughing. Maybe embracing each other while smiling and laughing. This does nothing to sell me on a Badly Bent show. The guy looks like a prick, but that's just because of the ballcap (which can be purchased at the nearest Rip Griffin for $7.99--one size fits all).

Okay, so maybe fifteen fans was a little generous. It might just be Margaret, but let me tell you, she's a huge fan.

Sox just took a 3-1 one lead on a three-run single by Jacoby Ellsbury. Yep, I said it, a three-run single. Let's do it tonight.

Wednesday, October 01, 2008

I NEED BASEBALL PLAYOFFS LIKE A KNIFE IN THE HEAD

Don't get me wrong, I love me some playoffs and I'm proud of my boys for scooting their way in, but it wouldn't be possible to find a gnarlier time of year for a playoff series that starts on the West Coast at 9PM tonight. Geez.

And it's against the Angels.

Paskins' Tigers couldn't lock out the White Sox. Paulie's Twins couldn't even score a run against them. Ron's Mets flopped again. And the Rays are about to be exposed for the team they really are. Let's see what they're made of. Cubs vs. Sawx in the Series...let's go.